Holly's Story

Jo's Story

Maria's Story

Shawn's Story

My husband and I lost our first baby on March 12, 1998
after being married 2 1/2 months. Everything was going
fine until I went to the bathroom one day and was
spotting. I went to the OB an ultrasound was done with
no heartbeat found. The doctor's only reply was "well
it looks like your having a miscarriage, I will have
to do an internal". There was not an ounce of
compassion- I couldn't even call my husband. I had a
d&c that night and went home in complete shock. I was
in denial for about a week and then got extremely
angry. I just wanted my baby back and no one seemed to
understand that I was grieving. I even had someone ask
me what i had done wrong.

My husband and I agreed not to try again immediately.
We wanted to move back to New York from Tennessee to
be with our families. We were able to make our move on
9/26/98 (my due date).

We started trying again in February and we found out
we were expecting again in August with a due date of
4/13/00. I was scared to death. My OB did not seemed
concerned that i had already had a miscarriage. During
my first pregnancy I had an nausea every evening. This
time there was no nausea but I did have breast
tenderness like before. I figured that no nausea was a
good sign because it was different from the first
pregnancy. I had my first OB appointment and the urine
test indicated a bladder infection. I was suprised
because i had no symptoms. I was going to the bathroom
more but i figured that it was because of the
pregnancy. I finished my antibiotic and was feeling ok
other than being tired. On September twentieth I went
to the bathroom and once again there was blood. I was
all only at home and just started shaking. I knew that
I would lose the baby. I called my mom who told me to
call the doctor. She then called my husband at work
who made ot home in about five minutes. She also came
with my sister. The doctor's office said to go to the
ER. When they checked me in my temp was 102 - I had no
idea. I was flushed and hot but that is a typical
reaction to stress for me. They did a blood test and
another urine which showed I still had an infection so
they said that the would put me on IV antibiotics.
They checked for a heartbeat with the doppler and
could not find it. to treat it. They then paged the OB
on call
who said he would do an ultrasound. An internal
earlier that evening showed that my cervix was closed
and there was no more blood. I was also told for the
first time that I had a tilted uterus so that might
make it difficult to find the heartbeat. The OB did a
vaginal ultrasound and said "I am sorry but the baby
is gone". I just started wailing. I had a D&C again
the next day and they treated me with antibiotics.

The OB agreed to do some testing, I had to know why
this was happening to me. I feel empty inside and ache
for a baby. I have been tested for antibodies,
ureaplasma and mycoplasma, all of which came back
negative. I will have a hysteroscopy and endometrial
biopsy this month. If they show nothing, my husband
and I will go through genetic testing. At this point I
don't know if I will ever have a child of my own. I
don't feel like I could stand another loss. There are
days when I think I won't try again unless they find
the reason for my losses. Then I am desperate to be
pregnant again and have a baby. I hate feeling so out
of control.

Contact Shawn at shawnleedavis@yahoo.com

Kyra's Story

Traci's Story

In Feb. of 97 I went off the pill to try to have
another child. In June of 98 I got pregnant. We went
in for the first dr. appointment & the dr did an
ultrasound & found no heartbeat. I miscarried in Aug
of 98. I was devestated & my husband didn't want to
try anymore. It was very hard to deal with. I wondered
what I had done to this child that made it miscarry.

So, now we are still trying but are grateful that we
have our daughter.

 
 

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